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  Chapter 15: Liz

  I lie in bed in the dark of the night, when I suddenly hear Zeke whimpering at the bottom of the stairs. I creep warily to the bottom, holding onto the banister. Noises are coming from Jake’s room as if he is wrestling a mountain lion. This must be what is making Zeke whimper. I am frightened to see what is happening, but Zeke nudges me down the hallway to Jake’s room. I walk apprehensively.

  Jake’s door is open a sliver. The bedside lamps are knocked over.

  I call out his name ever so softly.

  “Jake?”

  I swallow hard as I creak open the bedroom door. Zeke whines. I pat his head, hoping he won’t leave me alone. As I take a step into the room, I witness Jake fiercely swinging his arms, fighting. Whom is he fighting? No one is here, but he is yelling and cursing. I am making shadows in his room. Could my shadows be disturbing him? I turn on his bedroom light. The illumination makes no difference in his actions. Could my reflection in his dresser mirror be bothering him?

  “Jake,” I say quietly, hoping not to make him more agitated.

  He’s in his bed, violently rolling as if in a struggle with someone. He is thrashing on the bed as if he wants to escape the bed and run. Sweat runs profusely down his forehead. It’s as if he is reliving a haunting memory in excruciating detail. He is waging his own war within the confines of his own bed. I take a few more steps to discover his bed sheets are drenched. His pajama bottoms are soaked.

  This is beyond any nightmare; Jake is having a severe night terror. Will he strike me? Strangle me? I don’t want him to turn on me.

  I want to run out of the room, hide. I can’t leave Jake, not like this.

  “Jake, you’re all right,” I say gently.

  I try to comfort him as he sits upright in bed looking straight at me, but through me. His eyes are glossy and his gaze is blank. I nudge him softly. I gently touch his hand. Jake pulls his hand abruptly away from mine.

  I speak calmly and repetitively, hoping any words spoken would be better than silence. “Jake, you’re in the cabin in your own bed.”

  I place my hand over his again. This time he allows me to touch him. His eyes become more alert.

  “It’s okay,” I say softly. My heart aches for him.

  Zeke is at the base of Jake’s bed, whining. I motion for him to leave and he prances his way out the door.

  Jake is panting. His chest is wet. Hair is dripping. Tears flood down his face. I want to wrap my arms around him. I worry my arms will make him feel like I’m holding him down, confining him. I don’t want to make him feel trapped. I only want to soothe him. I know I can’t make this night terror stop abruptly.

  Jake begins to breathe slower. His emerald green eyes come into focus.

  “Liz! Oh, Liz!” he sobs. “I’m so sorry.”

  As I look into Jake’s sorrowful, broken eyes, he makes me think of a violin string stretched so tightly it might break at any moment. He troubles me with his broken eyes.

  I shake my head. “There’s nothing to be sorry about. Nothing at all, Jake,” I say calmly because there is nothing to apologize for. He obviously has no control over a night terror.

  He wraps his arms around me. I feel as if I am holding all of his weight on me, all his fears, all of his demons, all of his pain. My head rests against the beat of his heart. It feels as if it may thump out of his chest.

  Jake’s fingers stroke my hair. This must bring some sort of comfort to him. I wonder how often night terrors appear in the dark of the night.

  Chapter 16: Liz

  I wake to a loud thump outside the cabin. I quickly dress and run outside to find Jake has knocked down the wall of the small, weathered cabin, the cabin where he kept me chained. The back wall is down in one large piece. It is lying flat on the ground. Jake is moving crates and boxes into the gaping open cabin with ease. He arranges the crates meticulously, because that's how Jake is, meticulous. He lays out mouse poison and sets traps before pulling the wall back into place with a chain, that chain, my chain. I shudder.

  I learned the hard way not to sneak up on Jake. I must make my presence clearly known, especially if he is engaged in something important. Even when I think I should not bother him, I should.

  I holler, "Hey, what are you doing?”

  Jake removes the nails from his mouth, the ones he is using to hammer the wooden planks. “I’m returning this cabin to its proper use of storing stuff.”

  Jake tosses the chain into the now restored cabin with ease. It’s as if Jake wants me to see the original purpose of that substantial chain, in his own way proving once and for all it will not be used on me again.

  With his hammer in one hand and my pink running shoe in his other, he walks toward me and I stiffen in fear. Jake notices my reaction and slowly slides the hammer into the tool belt fastened around his waist. He gingerly hands me the shoe I left behind in the cabin before I ran off into nothingness.

  "See, I'm not going to lock you up again," he tells me.

  Jake nonchalantly gives me a friendly peck on the forehead before he returns to finish what he started. His little peck makes me tremble, but this time not with anxiety or edgy nerves. This trembling feeling is different. It gives me a type of warmth I should not be welcoming, but I do.

  Part of me wants to ask what happened to my other shoe. I’d really like to know. I would especially like it back. They are of better use to me as a pair than separate. I decide not to press Jake because I know I am not going to get answers. There’s something mysterious and distant about him. He tells me very little. I am simply grateful I can freely return to the main cabin to take a shower.

  After lunch Jake turns to me. "If you are going to keep cooking, which by the way you don't have to, I really can handle more than just MRE packets; I need to show you where I keep everything stocked. Grab a sweatshirt. I'm going to retrieve some flashlights from the garage.”

  Not knowing what Jake is proposing, I run up to the loft to retrieve a sweatshirt.

  I meet Jake on the front porch, feeling anxious as to where he is taking me. Jake has on a light vest with a jacket rolled up under his arm, flashlights in his other hand. He tells me we are taking a trail behind the cabin. I follow, hoping I am stronger than I was on our last uphill climb.

  We walk about fifty yards before reaching a rocky mound against a hillside. I am managing this jaunt with ease.

  "Do you want to go the fun way or the easy way?” Jake asks, handing off the rolled up jacket and flashlight.

  I lift my left eyebrow. "What are you talking about?"

  "There's a cave up ahead," Jake says, pointing to the rocky hillside area.

  My eyes widen in delight. "You have a cave on your property?"

  "Yeah, I'll show you the main opening. Then I'll show you how to climb down into it. Follow me.”

  “Okay!" I follow with anticipation.

  Jake leads me to the dark opening.

  I stand still. "I changed my mind. I'm not going in there.”

  "Are you afraid of caves?" Jake inquires.

  "No." I shake my head.

  "Bats. Are you afraid of bats? Bats are rarely in there. If there are any, they won’t hurt you."

  "It's not that," I say with a quiver in my voice.

  "Well, I'm not going to tie you up and leave you in there," Jake assures me.

  I smile, embarrassed to admit I would think such a thing. I am curious to go cave exploring. I won’t deny it. At my feet, I notice a tiny trickle of water running out of the cave. I peek through the opening and feel the coolness of the cave air on my face, nippier than a typical cave.

  "This isn't a regular hole-in-the-wall kind of cave. It's an ice cave," I say.

  I turn my flashlight on and proceed to step lightly through the arched opening.

  "How did you know? Have you been in one before?” Jake asks.

  "I went hiking in one while we were camping in Idaho. It was out of the way and hard to find. You would miss it if you didn't know what you
were looking for. There were small signs posted, describing how Native Americans used the caves to store their meat in the summertime."

  Jake aims his flashlight. "Exactly!"

  My eyes follow the beam of his flashlight to find boxes and crates labeled immaculately: poultry, fish, meat, and his grandpap’s collection of wine that he mentioned over dinner. Everything perfectly stacked and labeled. This is nothing less than a spectacular walk-in freezer created by nature.

  "What doesn't fit in the fridge gets put in here, so if you can’t find something, it most likely is stored in one of these boxes. You can help yourself or I will come find it for you. None of it should be expired. I give everything away when I leave and restock it when I return."

  He said it again. “When I leave.” Where does he go? What does he do? How long is he gone? I hope he will reveal it to me on his own.

  I wonder if the dark freaks him out like the rain. Does the dark bring on some sort of demon in his mind? I assume it doesn't since he seems to come and go from this cave frequently based on how he keeps the fridge stocked.

  Jake shines the flashlight on my face.

  "Oh, there are your blue eyes! You're so quiet. I wasn't sure if you went forward or back out of the cave."

  "I'm still here.” I smile ruefully. “Did you say there's more to the cave?”

  "Yeah, but I warn you, it's dark and slick. You want to check it out?" Jake asks with excitement.

  I point my flashlight ahead. "Definitely!"

  I keep the light pointed at the icy ground at my feet. Jake is close behind, ready to catch me if I slip. I take baby step after baby step before I begin to feel comfortable with my stance on the ice. My baby steps turn into gentle glides. Jake shines his flashlight upward. Large icicles hang from the ceiling of the cave and water drips onto my head from icicles that are melting.

  The floor of the cave is not flat like an ice skating rink. The frozen ice has formed over the curves and mounds inside the cave. It's not as white as snow cone ice; it has turned gray from the ice melting and mixing with the dirt. It feels bizarre going instantly from the heat of the summer into arctic cold temperatures. I'm glad Jake brought an extra jacket; I couldn’t bear the cold in the cave.

  The cave becomes darker the further we walk. The light of the flashlights cut into the darkness like a sword. We laugh and grab hold of each other as if we are kids just learning how to ice skate on a pond for the first time. Our voices bounce off the walls of the cave. Ahead is a beam of sunlight creeping its way inside.

  "Where’s that light coming from?" I ask with curiosity.

  "There is an opening overhead and you can climb out of the cave. My grandpap put in a thick climbing rope. It's still there, but I'm going to suggest we turn around and walk back the way we came in."

  "Why? It'll be fun! Didn’t you say yourself there was a fun way?" I ask surprised that he wouldn’t want to climb out on the rope.

  "I don't want your bruises or skin to get worse from the rope."

  "Thanks, but I'm wearing long sweatpants and a sweatshirt with long sleeves to protect my arms. I'll be fine.”

  I walk toward the beam of light instead of turning around. Jake follows. The light coming through the opening is bright enough so we no longer need our flashlights. We turn the flashlights off and put them in our pockets. Jake tugs down hard on the rope to check if it is secure. The rope is unmovable.

  Jake holds the rope and says, "Ladies first."

  "You go; show me how it's done," I insist.

  "Leave no one behind. I'd rather watch you struggle up the rope for an hour than sit at the top worrying if you are going to drop back down to the solid ice with no one to catch you."

  I reluctantly take hold of the rope. I wrap my hands around the twisted cords. I feel incredibly weak as I pull myself up the rope. I grab hold of a jagged rock to pull myself to the light of day. Jake climbs the rope in a fraction of the time it took me.

  "How did you do that?” I look down at the rope swinging in the cave.

  Jake shrugs. "I just can."

  It’s no big deal to him, yet I am amazed at how quickly he climbed the rope as if he were a gladiator.

  I look around at our surroundings. We are standing on top of the cave, but on the other side. Each step we take to get down is over rugged, loose rocks. Jake intently watches my every step, making sure I don’t fall. His hand is at the small of my back, ready to catch me quickly. I continue to take small steps as I wobble across the rocks. I grab hold of his hand as we make our way down.

  Before taking the final leap off the rocks, Jake leans down and whispers in my ear, “I don’t know what I would have done if you fell off the rope and landed back down in the cave.”

  He kisses my cheek by my ear, in a soft, sweet spot. His touch is sending an electric sensation through my entire body. I stand unmoved, taking in the blissful moment. His gentle touch, his warmth makes me turn scarlet as a smile unfolds on my face.

  “If you bruised yourself more or broke anything, it would have devastated me.” Jake jumps off the rock first, grabs me by the waist to pull me down to the dirt path. I feel a rush of impulsive happiness running through me. I can’t deny it and I can’t push it away. I shouldn’t allow myself to feel this way, but it feels so natural.

  It hits me like a ton of brinks: this guy likes me, really likes me. A peck on the forehead, his flirtatious way of grabbing hold of me in the cave, and now a kiss by the ear. Perhaps he’s just a flirty kind of guy. Should I dismiss it all? Everything is mixed up in my head, all muddled. I can’t think straight. Jake abducted me, yet he is being so nice to me. Too nice. Jake is making it difficult to feel contempt against him. I shouldn’t be fraternizing with my enemy. Is he my enemy?

  As we walk together on the dirt trail back to the cabin, I say to Jake, “Thank you for taking me. That was fun!”

  “You can come back anytime. Well, of course, you will have to return if there’s something you want to cook that is not stocked in the cabin. I’m not going to stop you from cooking. But do me a favor and only use the main entrance unless I am with you.”

  “I will,” I assure him.

  My hard shell softens more and more in his presence.

  Chapter 17: Liz

  It is unusually chilly on this summer night as I walk out of the cabin into the dark. I wrap a quilt tightly around my arms. The sun has long gone and taken another day of my life with it, another flawless day. A day I would not have replaced for anything. I am with a man who looks at me as if I am the most beautiful thing on this Earth. I am breathing in fresh air, walking in the most majestic landscape, and I feel utterly amazing.

  The more steps I take, the more my eyes adjust from the light of being in the cabin to the dark of the night. My eyes rise upward to the beauty of the night sky. I can’t help but gaze at the stars in wonder. The moon is nothing but a sliver. Very little light pollution is evident here. The greatest asset of the property appears above my head at twilight. I am struck by how many stars prick the skies. The night is still until Jake’s voice echoes in the darkness.

  "Wait up!"

  "I'm not sharing this blanket. So bring your own," I call back to him. "I'm not kidding. I’m not sharing. It's chilly tonight and this blanket is all mine!"

  He smirks. "We'll have to see about that."

  Tonight, Jake reveals he knows more about the galaxy than I do. Our view of the heavens is not restricted as it is in cities and towns. There's no need for a telescope to marvel at the celestial beauty in the full view of the night sky as it blankets the atmosphere beyond. He rests his hand on my shoulder and I turn my face to it. His warm, strong hand is on me in a gentle, casual way. I force myself to pay attention as Jake points upward to the Big Dipper.

  “Now that the sun has completely set, you can find Mercury and Venus below Castor and Pollux,” Jake tells me.

  "Castor? Pollux? What are those?” I ask.

  "They are stars in the Gemini constellation," Jake answers before
continuing.

  This man knows his stars. I’m impressed.

  “They make a cosmic rectangle in the sky. It’s easy to find,” he explains while pointing up at the sky.

  "I didn't know that; show me more," I implore as I reach for his forearm.

  "Mercury is dim and just left of the planet Venus. They are easy to spot. They will vanish for a few weeks before making another appearance in the morning sky.”

  Jake has turned into my own personal sky map. He stands behind me, clasping his arms around my chest. My heart beats like a drum as he speaks into my ear. I fit perfectly against him. It’s as if I have always belonged in his arms. I shouldn’t feel this way. It is wrong to feel this way. My mind is cluttered, but I can’t help feeling so good next to him. I gasp in the beauty of the night, hoping this moment between us will never vanish.

  “My favorite summertime constellation is Leo. It's like he keeps watch over his kingdom of stars.”

  Jake points to the moon and says, "The moon sits below the belly of Leo, depending on which night of the week it is."

  I am lost in my own thoughts as I feel his warmth and I lose myself in the perfection of this moment.

  "Can you spot Saturn?” Jake leans to ask my starstruck face.

  I tell him I cannot. If I lie and pretend I do, I have a feeling Jake will know immediately. He is a bit of a stargazing expert, from what he has told me so far.

  "Saturn is golden and glows softly, high in the south. It can be confused with the bright star, Spica, sitting at Saturn's right. Using the moon as a guide, you can easily spot Saturn at the moon's upper right."

  "I honestly cannot tell the difference between a star, satellite, and a plane when I am at home.” I chuckle.

  "This is the perfect time of year for satellite watching, since you can spy them as late as midnight. It's fun to watch random satellites fly over. Plus, we’re in a perfect location. You can’t see this in a desert sky,” Jake explains.